The first time I decided to spend 2 days in the countryside... I left home thinking, I'll breathe in fresh air, enjoy the silence, surrounded by nature.
And off I went.
I arrived, settled in, and went for a walk. I took several photos, and in the distance I could hear the wind turbines, vroom vroomm.
Night fell, and the cold started to set in. I thought, I'll light the fireplace, since I'm in the countryside, I'll do as the locals do.
It took me nearly 2 hours to get the fireplace going. The logs wouldn't catch, I used up almost all my firelighters, and even went outside to gather branches just to get a fire started. Why on earth won't this light?
I finally managed it, but then what did I go and do...
I went to the bathroom, and when I came back into the living room, a thick fog had settled over everything. I could barely see the sofa, my eyes were stinging, and the smoke smell was so strong I couldn't stop coughing.
I rushed to throw open the doors and windows and fled outside.
After several long minutes freezing out there, I thought, this never happens to me in the city.
Once the fog cleared, the fire in the fireplace had finally caught, and the room started to warm up. But, frozen as I was, I went to the bedroom, where the heater turned out to be my saving grace.
But the misfortune didn't end there.
If the turbines were barely noticeable during the day, at night the vroomm got even louder. But I thought, I'm in the countryside, time to relax, forget about the turbines.
Then I started hearing cars passing in the distance on the highway, going at high speed. And again I told myself, you're in the countryside, relax.
I was nearly asleep when cars started passing right by my window, 1, 2, 3, and there I was counting them.
Still, I smiled and told myself, this is the countryside.
A little while later, already resigned to country life, the symphony began. Dogs from every direction seemed to agree it was the perfect hour to bark, an absolutely infernal racket.
I thought, gosh, the city isn't even this noisy, and it has more people, more cars, more animals, yet I still sleep soundly there at night.
But I did eventually fall asleep.
The next day, when I woke up, my whole body ached, the mattress was awful, and to top it all off, the entire house reeked of smoke.
I went out to the terrace and sat in the morning cold. It felt wonderful, crisp, fresh air instead of the stale smoke smell inside.
Smiling, I got dressed and headed out to explore the countryside.
The day went well. I visited some truly beautiful places and did a lot of walking. Time flew by as I discovered spots I'd never been to before. I even forgot all the trouble from the night before.
When I got back to the house, I thought, I'll risk it and light the fireplace again. Surely by now I'm practically an expert, it'll go much better than yesterday.
So I did...
What a terrible idea.
After 3 trips outside to gather branches and twigs, I used up every firelighter I had, even threw in some paper, and those blasted logs still wouldn't catch.
How do people even get this thing to light?
Does it have some kind of on/off switch? Or is it just for decoration?
It finally caught fire, and once again the fog rolled in. What a disaster, why did I even bother lighting it again.
What was I thinking? Back out into the cold I went, everything wide open, and there I was thinking, any minute now someone's going to walk right in, a house right by the road, completely open like this, I'm going to get robbed...
I shut up the house and went to the bedroom. The darkness, mixed with the remaining fog still lingering in the living room, started spreading through the rest of the house. I went to the bathroom, looked around, and thought...
Good grief, it looked like a scene from a horror movie, all that was missing was Freddy Krueger or that guy from Friday the 13th showing up, the set was already there.
I went into the bedroom and locked myself in.
And I thought, if that doorknob turns, I'm jumping out the window.
That's when the noises started, the turbines, the cars in the distance and right by the house, the dogs, and on top of it all, the creaks and cracks of the house itself. I was terrified.
I thought, so I came to the countryside to relax, and here I am hiding in the bedroom, afraid of the dark. The silence I thought I'd find doesn't exist.
As for the fresh air, forget it, everything smelled of fireplace smoke. Even I reeked of smoke, but I didn't have the nerve to go to the bathroom and shower.
So...
At 1am I said, I've had enough, I'm leaving! Furious, I grabbed my things and threw my coat on over my pajamas. I opened the door hoping no one was on the other side, rushed to turn on every light, peeked out the window to check if anyone was on the street, and flew to the car.
I sped off. By 3am I was home, showered, warm and comfortable in my own bed, and for a moment I heard... nothing!
Oh, what a wonderful thing, the "noise" of the city!
